listen to me for awhile.

i know it hard to listen to my whisper. i know that i'm not good enough for you to pay your attention.

you never try to listen first then you always give you answer rather than listen to my question is. it too hard to  imagine because you are the people i love the most. i can't resist for what you did to me. it make  me die slowly.. my heart..my soul.. broken into pieces. you never try to know the truth.

asking doesn't mean it the finale. i'm just asking. it too hard to hear your voice. i can't stand it anymore. you're are loveliest for most people in the world but me. you are the one that teach me what is love.

you, one word you give to me is the potion that boost myself to live. but recently, your word make my day sorrow and darker. i don't why. i know it a sin to feel like that to you. it really. . .

i ask forgiveness with the deepest of my heart because i can't talk to you.

you said that you never forgive me for what i've done. i never try to throw you away. never. but, you always in my heart. even you never accept me as part as your life.

i know that i'm different from the others. never make you happy rather than always make you sad and angry. i know. i'm not the happy news for you. i always the nightmare. maybe...

i just want you to know, please listen to my heart. even for a second. just for awhile. because you are the one that give me the first love in the world. and i want you to feel the love from me. even a drop of it.

i am very sorry if i'm not the one you want in this world. you always mention that. why? if you scared that i will ruin your life, why you give me this life? but i always remember, everything happen must be reason behind it.

i hope that you will always happy. always smile with the people around you. i hope you can read this even i know it impossible.

for the one i loved the most,

***